Telemedicine

Hello fellow pandemic people!  Which is pretty much the whole world!!  Can I just say that I am with you in this time of change.  I just had to say that.  My kids and I just had a whole conversation about how every commercial and every email from businesses has started this way.  And now, I’m a little pissed off from the businesses that haven’t emailed me to tell me that they are with me!  Hey, furniture store that I bought a couch from last summer–are you not there for me?  Copy store, where are you?  Why aren’t you here when I need you?  Beauty supply store?  Hello?  Do you not care about me?  Sigh……

I have to tell you what has worked out really well in this staying home/virtual time of ours-  Telemedicine.  I had my annual gynocologist appointment during these months.  I was given a choice of going into the office or staying home and having the appointment online.  I’m thinking-hey, I don’t have to drive, go to a sterile doctors office, no mask wearing–no brainer.

Let me tell you ladies, this is the way to go.  I got all the instructions in the mail and it really is very simple and much more comfortable than in the office.  You get to be in your own bedroom, total privacy, you warm the instruments to your temperature etc.  Once you get the camera angle correct, the rest is easy.  They mail you the instruments (utensils?) in a sterile package, so no worry about that.  Yes, it takes a little finagaling to use them correctly, but if you go to the gym or do yoga, you can do it.  They are sized longer for individal use vs the doctors use. You lay on your bed with your computer near your legs.  It’s kind of like a zoom call.  The doctor tells you to move left, right, closer etc.  You get your sample and boom, you’re done! You mail your sample in a sealed envelope and voila, you don’t have to go to the gyno for another year!!

Now, you’re probably thinking, Laura, you are crazy for doing this.  And if I did do this, yes, I would be crazy.  Because this is totally made up.  But I bet I had you going for awhile didn’t I?  This is a crazy world we’re living in and who knows what the next thing is around the corner.

I will say, I did have a gynocologist appointment but I did go to the office.  And what I thought was funny is that I’m practically naked, BUT I still had my mask on!!!  So everything else is uncovered for the world to see except for my mouth!  Kind of seems a little insulting?  Or is that a compliment?  I’m not sure.  But whatever it is, it’s now a visual for you people!  You’re welcome LOL.  Please make me firmer and stronger in the visual that you have of me 🙂

I think I’m back in the groove of writing.  So hopefully you’ll see more of these blogs!

Remember,

Itlbok, really!

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10 thoughts on “Telemedicine

  1. Hahaha! You had me going! I thought, why wasn’t I given this choice by my doctor!? Glad you are back in the groove, because you do bring laughter to us all with your whimsical stories! Thank you.

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  2. LOL!! You write so well. And you almost had me going–again!! Kinda like cologuard for home use. And I’m with you–LOL. If I hear one more commercial about our “challenging times” and what the car company or bank or food service can do for me, I might pop. I love your blog!!!

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  3. Laura, that was literally a scream. It put images in my head that I now have to drown with vodka. I’m so psyched that you’re back to writing!

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  4. Okay. I didn’t fall for it at as you intended but I did think you were going in a different direction.
    On your bed with legs spread out.
    + web camera at your feet
    + someone watching telling you what to do
    + you putting your hands and devices in your privates
    + sized longer for individual use
    Then you end it with “Please make me firmer and stronger”.
    I was waiting for you to tell us that you started a new online business.
    😂 😂 😂

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