Yes, I know I missed writing my blog last week, but I have a really good reason. The best reason! A tree limb tried to get the best of me. Little did that branch know who it was dealing with. Not only do I have a large head but it’s pretty hard and tough! Many people have said it takes a lot to get through my thick skull—How right they are!
Two weeks ago I was walking my little dog Beaux, and listening to music on my cell phone—but not using headphones which I think may have saved my life. Or at the very least my hair. I heard a crack above me. That’s a sound that makes you stop and think when you’re walking around New England in October. I saw the limb but just couldn’t move away in time. My husband swears I threw my body on top of my dog to save him from bodily harm. My cute little 15 pound Beaux-Beaux. Now if I thought of that, I probably would have, but not much thinking took place.
Next thing I knew, Clunk on head, slowly I went down (really it was like slow motion) and I was on the ground. Just like in the movies. On my back, hands out to my side bent by my ears, knees bent, like a chalk outline.
Beaux was by my side but I didn’t have his leash. I don’t know how long I was laying there—not too long. Three men heard the crack and came to investigate and saw me on the ground. Now this road is a dead end with about five houses on it. If they didn’t come out to check out the sound, I don’t know how long it would have taken for someone to find me. This isn’t my block that I normally walk my dog. Long story short…..they saw the blood, called an ambulance and sent me to a trauma unit.
Again JUST like tv….Good thing the EMT guy warned me or else I would have thought I was dying. He said, once I bring you into the hospital six people are going to ascend upon you like you’re a turkey at the Thanksgiving dinner. They’ll talk to you and manipulate you all at once. Don’t worry—let them do it all. Since I knew I was OK it was fascinating. But I’m glad he warned me. And since they don’t waste time getting your info, my bracelet says Jane Doe-how cool is that! I kept the bracelet. Haven’t we always, just for a time….wanted to be Jane Doe? No bills, no responsibilities, just going thru life, la la la la la. Anyway back to story.
I had one of those neck collars put on me before I got into the ambulance, you know in case of spinal injuries. And the doctor said, “ok we’re going to have to cut off you’re sweatshirt to get it over the collar”. Now—Just that morning I said to myself, “ It’s been so warm all season, I haven’t been able to wear my favorite sweatshirt (it’s a black sweatshirt with beautiful autumn leaves—so it’s very seasonal, and with this climate change, autumn is turning into just a long summer). I really want to wear my autumn sweatshirt today!” (Yes, I really said this to myself. And yes I have fascinating conversations like this with myself all the time. And sadly, now you’re reading about these fascinating conversations. I just can’t understand why I’m not making money on these blogs!!) So when the doctor said he wanted to cut it off—No No. I asked him to please not cut off my favorite sweatshirt :-). And he said he could work around it and saved my sweatshirt. See, as long as you’re not dying, all you have to do is ask nicely 🙂 But really, isn’t it pretty? Half of you are agreeing with me, half of you are shaking your head, I know. LOL
And THEN, when another doctor said she would have to shave part of my head to put in staples I said, “please don’t shave my head, my hair is my best part of me”. I mean, I’m not exactly Rapunzel but it’s still my best physical quality. Obviously they realized I wasn’t dying or paralyzed. She said OK, some hair would just also get stapled. No problem. Was there lots of dried blood—yes. Could I not wash or rinse my hair for days—yes. Did my hair start looking like a Rastafarian—yes. But no hair got shaved!
I got a CT Scan, listened to some annoying beep beep beeping from the neighboring beds monitor–which trust me, when you have a headache is like Chinese water torture (sorry, is that not politically correct anymore?). Even my son Mark put his arm around me because he knew the beeping was getting to me–and that’s pretty big for him. And do you know, as a Mom, that gesture made this whole event worth it. My sons not very demonstrative. Mark met me at the hospital because my husband Craig was about an hour away at a golf game . I called Craig from the ambulance, and told him to finish his game. Honestly, there was nothing he could do, he might as well finish the game. But maybe he might not want to go out to dinner afterwards–I’m not THAT good a wife! Of course, later I find out Craig drove 100mph to get to the hospital. Mark filled out most of the hospital paperwork, even knew mine and my husbands phone numbers by heart. Now, come on, how many of us know our kids phone numbers without looking them up on the phone? Hmmmm? I was impressed.
Anyway, after some people-watching, I: 1) told my nurse that one of the labs techs was flirting with her, judging from his body language; 2) so BADLY wanted to tell another woman who walked past me dozens of times to fix the back of her blouse, and; 3) was watching other patients getting wheeled in, and wanting to ask, “so whatcha in for?”, but I held back… (See? I do have some restraint!)
Eventually I was sent home, got to enjoy a few days with Percoset, made my doctor laugh because after four days with Percoset I was afraid I was going to get addicted and told her I wouldn’t take anymore. I made pumpkin bread for the men who found me, and thanked them for “going out on a limb for me”. They told me that I told them (I have no recollection of this) that I put up an arm to protect my head-I do have a bruise on my arm but just assumed I got it from falling. THAT’s why I think not wearing earbuds may have saved my life. If I was wearing earbuds, would I have heard the crack from the tree limb? Probably not. I then wouldn’t have put up any protection and the limb would have fallen straight onto my head. Not a pretty thought.
What did I learn from this? That I’m unbelievably lucky? In this case, pretty much. Am I not going to walk under trees anymore? Not at all! I LOVE AUTUMN AND I LOVE TREES. Freak accidents occur. Odds are it won’t happen again (actually I did get hit on the head with a rock that came out of the woods-totally from nowhere–when I was in middle school. So I have a scar from stitches on the other side of my head. Apparently I’m a magnet. Maybe my skull/brain should be studied? I’m like Bruce Willis in the movie Unbreakable. Of course I just jinxed myself. I’m now going to step on a paperclip and break a hip).
What is so cool that everyone should learn from this? Don’t worry about things!! Honestly! Every single time something has happened to me or someone in my family (which has been often) it has always been unexpected. So if it’s unexpected, then worrying is totally pointless. Hence here– I probably said to my husband before he left, “careful driving”….it’s not like he would have said to me, “careful staying home”. Right? Such a weight off your shoulders isn’t it? You can just go through your daily life like a happy little puppy. Things will happen whether you worry about them or not. I just saved you OODLES of brain time NOT worrying about things! Your welcome!
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Only you could make me laugh at your unfortunate accident. What an adventure!! I love how the hospital staff saved Jane doe’s favorite sweatshirt which I love and your hair which I also love but don’t agree is your best feature but we can argue about that another time. Very grateful that you are ok and your little dog too. PS: please get a helmet. 👳♀️
You even manage to find humor in what could have been a potentially very serious injury. Little did that branch know whose head it was hitting! I can see you now scrunching your eyebrows together pleading for your sweatshirt AND hair. I get the hair, believe me. I’m so relieved that you had the good fortune to be found quickly and that you are on the mend. We miss you at Jazzercize but want you to fully recover before you return to teaching. Hope to see you soon!
Thanks Paula. Believe me, I know how lucky I am! That’s why it’s easy to find the humor. The doctor gave me the ok to return Monday as a student. And I’m hoping to return as an instructor on Saturday. I just can’t get kicked in the head!
What an ordeal you’ve been through, but It’s a huge relief that your dog, sweatshirt, brain, and fabulous curls are safe. Reading your post, I was struck by the wisdom of your acronym, ITLBOK. I’m so glad it rang true!
LOL So true! My brain….we’ll never know.