Keeping the lines of communication open by keeping your mouth shut.

beach stock photoAhhhhh, the joys of having young adult kids in your life.  No more worries, no more being concerned about their actions or decisions.  Just basking in the awareness that they’ve absorbed all the knowledge that you’ve given forth.  You can now enjoy conversations with them about philosophies of life, PBS and the wonderful upbringing they had. 

All your worries and fears are over.  My theory is once your kids are 21, nothing bad can happen to them.  I’ve written it down, it’s now on the World Wide Web so it’s fact!  I also live on this beautiful little isle.  It’s the isle of De……Denial.  Lovely little place…..come grab a tropical drink and join me……beach stock photo

 

 

I have a son and daughter, 23 and 21 respectively.  Both really good kids, went to college, don’t do drugs (at least not in front of me-just kidding), minimally curse (at least not in front of me), no jail time and not pregnant (not that there’s anything wrong with that if you have kids that are pregnant.  I’m just glad mine have decided to wait before bringing kids into this world).   So again, I repeat, really good kids.  If only I knew how to talk to them!!!   I finally learned how to deal with teenagers.  Sort of—Basically count to ten, breathe, take nothing personally and wait for them to go to college.  But I didn’t really get that until about two years ago when they were already out of the teenage years!  Now I’ve got a new age group to learn about!  

You’re supposed to talk to them like adult but can’t really talk to them like they’re adults.  I’ve tried that.  I’ve tried talking to them, asking about their friends, their social lives, their futures……whoooooooo boooooyyyyyyy.    They did not respond like any adult friends I know!!  My adult friends LIKE my advice and/or suggestions.   Let’s just say my children don’t seem to see things the same way I do. Yeah, that’s a good way to put it.  But I have SUCH GOOD ADVICE TO GIVE!!!! Or so I think 🙂  Apparently not!  I am learning advice is not something any child of mine wants.  

I have to say though, the other day my daughter and I spent the whole day together in Boston and had the best time  we’ve had in months.  Rules were set though (here’s a switch, the rules were set by her, not me).  No bringing up her boyfriend nor her future.  It worked!  We had a great time.  We discussed how it’s a balancing act for me.  How parenting a child in their 20’s is a learning curve, (as is being a person in your 20’s) and by the time I get it right, they will be married with kids of their own.  And then the balancing act will be ….mom, I need your help raising my kids because you did a really good job raising us, BUT I don’t want to make the same mistakes you did…. AND things are totally different now, I can’t believe I survived the mistakes YOUR generation made….help me but don’t get too involved….etc.

Besides, we decided there will be an app for parenting by the time the next generation populates the world.  Iparenting it will be called.  Steve Jobs didn’t want to be around when it came out.  It will be available on Iphone 36.  Depending on your insurance plan, your in hospital delivery may even come with the Iparenting app included.   My daughter’s looking forward to the Iepidural.  You will have to pay extra for the upgrade but it will be worth it.  Just think– Baby’s crying? Just push the mute button,— youngster has no friends? Tiny Toons Tinder,–Child soiled their clothes?  Drone delivery service to drop fresh clean clothes in your lap!  

Yes, kids are fun, the roller-coaster of life. 

Oh, and they’re also good for making you feel old.  My daughter and I both have long curly hair.  Mine is auburn with streaks of golden brown  (totally natural from the sun :-))  and hers is dark goth black (as natural as mine!)  Walking down the streets of Boston, a guy on a skateboard  skates by and says, “love your hair, miss”.  And the torch has been passed! 

 Remember,

Itlbok, Really

PS- Per my MBSR-mindfulness meditation class that I’m taking, I will be on an all day silent retreat this Sunday, 9:00-4:30.  No talking, no eye contact, no hand gestures.  Guess what next weeks blog will be about!!  Heck it might have to be audio!!!

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